today i told guanlin:
"i'm losing it, i'm not feeling the same anymore." (of course, cutting out a lot of crucial details)
somehow, i hoped, and tried to make that feeling come back. but its no longer the same. every night i thought about it, and i asked myself again and again: what's the point? I'm failing everything. Even a stupid, stupid exercise, i can fail it. gl herself was shocked i said so.

valentine's day was rather fun, in a way! in the morning gt pissed off thanks to someone who say "i duno! i duno!" when i ask for almost a week liao. then go class leader workshop, and sat with qh and jiarong and melvis, and then after a while eve came to join in! :D

the workshop wasn't that useful, but at least not only I am having problems -___-
then after that go see training a bit then left

omg benjamin button is a good show, but i fell asleep twice, because it was too long, and all the classical music are getting to me like shit! LOL. omg la! read sharon's post for more info xD (i lazy)

today was a fun day too xD i like the class a lot better hehe! ;d
was very tired at first and i fell asleep in LA AGAIN. *bangs into the wall* LOL. how many times must i sleep in front of nice mr. hor to make me not as tired! maths was fun not because of a little PMS-ed DL, but because siyi was damn high. but i wanted to sing so much!! :( then she kept scolding me :(

after school ate wanton mee for the second time of the day (recess!) then went to and fro class. then train so little (like nothing), and liuqiao eve ph and me went to cip! ;D
bleah bleah bleah. then it was rather late. so we went to LJS, and ate! LOL ok i didn't eat, but i koped from liuqiao xD hahaha! and we did math. then i realised i can't concentrate in math in front of others!! :O
then another thing happened. 2 boys started shooting ice balls at me (or us). you know, you crush the ice in your slimy mouth, and you take a straw and 'shoot' at your target? you know at first i was wondering huh, why is my arm a little wet? then i turn to my left and i saw the 2 hooligans! wtf! then i was like o.O at first because i was wondering why they shoot at us. then i turn away and continue then they shoot again!!! this time i was irritated so i stared at them. then one boy went "hello, what's your name?" i replied with a rather happy "hi" LOL. ok i admit it, i was stupid xDDDDD
then i was really angry, and i was like glaring at a girl who stood up. they seem to know each other, then she was like "no, no it's not me, it's them." i glared, and said "i know." LOL. how cool!! then the boy tried shooting from different angles, and i stared him down like hell xD
then he left lor, but i didnt know, so i was happily saying "wow, they seem scared by me!" LOL. =.=
then dad came to fetch me and i went home~
through it all, i found a group of friends that share the same belief as me always. I'm very happy to find them; they make my life a lot lot more interesting and everything. but somewhere deep in my heart, i wished the rest were part of it. Everyday is just a vicious cycle, that I get tired, tired, and even more tired. I tell myself it may end someday, but I don't want it to end like this. Ending like this makes my years all wasted. What about those days, those fateful days, when I felt as if things were not impossible. Right now, those are the perfect days I sought to look for. But will they come back? Looking at the photos make me sad. Where are those feelings? As i say i share the same belief, part of me wants to return to the other side. But the rest wants to stay there. No matter what, someday, that few words will be taken away from me, and i cannot stop it.