thanks tim. i will try to be myself once more, not disappointing anyone else. i promise to try.

omg. am i turning into a bitch or sth. pls tell me i am not.

omg. i read this new manga called absolute boyfriend in like 1 day. i started at 2 and just finished it. LOL.
omg. it's so saddening. i cried at the last chapter lah stupid ass. ahh my heart is like wretching. :( and omg it has 1% of sex content. but no nudity luckily. AHH. i feel like crying all over again stupid! it's like the robot malfunctioned but it just told the girl "i love you forever" and the girl went out and came back and he is like "dead" omg... then he even sent a letter to another guy to tell her "dont cry anymore." omg so touching can. it's only 30+ chapters. stupid asshole. and the robot kind of developed its own feelings. SIGH.

my quote for the day: don't cry anymore. (it's like the robot knows she will cry like crazy. and note: it's a robot.)
it's like a robot for a boyfriend, totally flawless and stuff. sigh. but it will malfunction one day. and the "death" will come someday. ahhhh:( i miss night. sigh.

oh my efffing god. i haven't started on anything for revision. AHH. it's midnight.aiya go sleep then tomorrow see if got mood or not lor. walao i gg liao. actually no need study one lah. this year scrap a 2.0 i can liao. but judging by the way my studies are going, it's quite a chore. walao.

oh yeah. my geog sucked. 6.5/14 LOL.i give up on geog liao lah.
bio okok lah. i love mr chow ban hoe. i copy last section wrongly and he only deducted 3 marks because the first question is impossible to do with the changed question. similarities between vitamins and proteins like what the hell. then he minus one more mark for not following instructions. walao he is damn nice actually if it were me i just put a beautiful big cross and draw an egg. then just fail the student lah. but he didn;t and i am so grateful he gave me a B3 lor. :D thank you mr chow!

btw, i realised that my new com over here restarts itself a lot. walao. pissed diao liao can. :(

hello
yawn. so tired. kept dozing off in class,
and i guess i was like OBVIOUS.
especially ytd
i was leaning against the wall
and my head kept slipping off
so its obvious i am sleeping

anyway if you haven;t realised
i am going blog in sec 1 style:D
hahaha
okay today went to queensway
with jas jiele gaun
then i ate my sec 1 favourite food - machicken
omg. i can hear jiarong screaming the calories to me
but who cares?
but i am like bankrupt
and i mean it.
i am only left with a pathetic 12 dollars
for the rest of month till 1 may
and i have the exams to survive through
alamak.


oh yeah
exams.
gg!
i win liao lor
now i still havent pack my stuff
nor have i arranged my stuff into a puny file so i can read
all of them are like
strewn in my bag and file and under table
alamak x2

aiyo.
i wanna read book
but cannot bring romance novel home
then others so boring
my mother like super anti-romance novel
i dunno why
walao why she must care about things
when other parents dont' give a damn?!
and the ugly woman with ugly hair took gauns phone
and came to house meeting at grand stand
grinning and smiling and looking so pleased
like she struck toto
nice one sia,
you win a thousand farts from me

omg
my studies are failing me
though it has been doing that
for a LONG time
let's see
chinese 23/40 (GG)
english C for article, and 9.5/16 for compre (GGG)
maths okay lah. 29/30 for test
*look, a thousnad got full marks*
chem 17/25 (GGGG)
*lan, everyone getting 20+*
bio gg one de(GGGGG)
copy wrong question already lost 10 marks
geog confirm gg(GGGGGG)
dunno what's a col, saddle, or even a ridge
SS 10/15? dunno but i think it sucks
LOL.
i gg or wad, yes i gg
walao i blog like a guy LOL
be happy with your results jiarong
yours are much better than mine

yawn. tired and sian
walao slept for only half an hour
then i forgot to off the fan
then it's now 10.13pm and
my dad called me a bird brain again
nice lah if i bird brain
then my parents are bird brains too
he called me basket before
means he father basket lah
lol.
useless attempt to twist my dad's words
walao how many parents scold you bird brain
almost everyday?
walao. sian diao can
i hate going home
and i love going school
muahaha.
imagine how much i hate my house
to actually say this
LOL.
cherie must have a space in your house
i may be coming over very soon to stay forever:D

sigh! today was quite fun can.

music:
hahahahah
i am posting again
in sec 1 way
so cute and cool
and marvellous
muahahahaha. okay
paiseh. okay!
i pro sia the melody instrument all played by
ME ALONE
woots (cheers)
hahaha

maths:
i thought i gg le
but in the end i survived anyway

recess:
hahahaha. ate bread in class, with dora next door

geog:
first few to get in
and it's damn cool
seeing people come in
and knowing you are in the first few rows
that didn't change a thing though
i was SLEEPING AND DOZING OFF IN FRONT OF HIS WRINKLY FACE
HAHAHA.

chemistry:
mr chua we will work hard for you!
:D <3>

YES!! I WON TIMOTHY TANG IN PINGU BLOODDDDDDD!!!! OH YEAH OH YEAH!

damn. ytd was a total fucking pissing dissy day.

congrats to bingle and his team. LOL. pro lah. everything oso pawned. :D

to felicia, lihui, linda, kaiping: don't ever give up. it's not your fault in anything. I am not disappointed, because i don't ever think i should. proud of you still, really. the fucking sirs can stick their asses into somewhere in that fucking school for all i care. who cares, it's not even a fair match in the first place. i want to see you smiling and working hard again on tuesday. please do.

i love you all. though it has been only months since i was first posted to your team. i thought it would be weird.. or even sian. but no, your presence made it so worth while for me to be in it. i know your take me as a senior, and try to respect me in many aspects, but i am not a senior in your team, but your number 5! i really love all of you. i was so happy to get a trophy, when i don't even deserve it at all. i didn't do anything, yet your all treated me so nicely... all i could do was to write a letter. your may think i am as good as your, but really.. i am not. i am not pro at all, if not why would i end up as a reserve? i dunno anything, i am serious. i don't even deserve a recognition, or even a trophy. your are the ones who did the work, yet i slack around, and get a name in the end. is that fair? The moment i got the trophy, i got sick of myself. i dont' deserve anything at all.. i love you all, even if it wasn't the trophy all of us wanted. it was the first time i got a trophy and i thank you for giving me this experience. i will return the trophy to sjab room on tuesday, and in the mean time, i won't even look at the trophy, because it makes me so sick of myself. i am so happy i ended up with your, because your gave me the passion to come for cca once again. if not for your, i may be ponning every single cca session i can get my hands on. thank you for changing me. :D (to show this is NOT an emo note)

ytd was kind of stupid. i was so afraid in the morning for the uniform inspection with FLLK then we tried banging and it sounded not too bad!! :D then the reserves were made to be marshals. and i was like "okay....-.-" and i told em i can't do uniform inspection with them le, then they were like disappointed. i felt kind of sad too la.. maybe if i made a great bang with them, i could delude myself i deserve the trophy a little more. :X
then i was like sitting outside holding room for like hours and hours doing almost nothing.... until lunch break i had some food, and i felt contented with the food then i almost fell asleep at my marshal duty. YAWN. but i kept myself awake by talking with the other marshal.

then i heard about some stuff, and got totally emo. then the other marshal was like "why you so moody?" i was like shrugging and laughing it off. but i already known, and i was so pissed. pissed. pissed. pissed. pissed. pissed.

we better change zone next year. we better.

on a better note, BINGLE IS PRO. PRO. PRO. he pawned the ambulance.



today: (i am posting this in the way i posted in sec 1)

i woke up like 9am
and went to the doctor
mr. mao fung hao rocks
he was like talking to my mom at first
then he realised i was there
then he was like "what's wrong with you?"
then i crapped and talked and explained
then he look at my mom "why you nvr bring her for checkup since last august?"
i met him last august about the same problem
then my mom speechless.
then i kind of smiled to myself.
but then he said "i can't identify the problem since it has been so long."
then i pissed liao
and i looked at my mom
and gave a fcuk you look
then mr. mao gave me
mc till 14/11/08
exemption from any stenuous exercises
then he checked my back,
and realised my whole right back is not straight
urgh.
last year mine was like perfect back
and now it's obvious it's not straight
wish i didn't get that cramp in the first place
and he said i am flat footed on my right
that will explain why i keep tripping over my bed
then he wanted to refer me to a specialist.
my mom booking maybe a few weeks later.
okay. that's really scary.
mr. mao said it is my bone
and got tight hamstring
urgh.
i love you mao. (not jiayi, or yinshiuan)

i dont even know what impression the teachers have of 3J anymore.
mr chan must be "3J is like cannot save liao. gg" kind of class. i mean, even if there was no ponners, he already had that idea planted in his head. 3E is always goodie, and we are always lazy. i mean, right. i am lazy,but not everyone are. don't treat all of us like we are nothing to you.

HAHA. today was plain, but i damn horny again. i was describing guys parts to nobelle then nobelle gave me the "shoo, if not you are asking for a fist" face, but i was not affected!:D yay. LOL. i was like so tired today. TIIIRRREEEDDD. during bio i was dozing off then between bio and SS everyone went to buy food i was sleeping on my table, and i really slept so nicely - a dreamless sleep.

sidetrack. did you know that dreams make your mind active, and thus you don't get enough sleep if you had an active dream with lots of activities? because it drains your mind and you still wake up groggy as usual.

right i was sleeping then cherie tapped on the window, and i just "huh...?" and opened the window, talked for a second or two and went back to sleep. yawn. yawn! then throughout ss i was like groggy and sleepy, but i couldn't sleep.

then we had CCA! hahaha! shoes not polished enough lor. lol. then i felt so sad i missed last year advance:( haha. i wish i went! D: but i can see my mei again. miss you okay! missed basic though it was tough.

then got first aid as casualty. jesslyn and felicia's team kind of learn from each other lor:D jiayou felicia, lihui, linda, kaiping! com this sat, and i believe you can do well de okay! you may be one year below the others, but your learn really quickly, and i believe you can do it! love all of you okay! i know whatever the result turns out, your will still smile after a moment's anguish! and no matter what #5 will be here for your okay! though i ain't much a help for anything, i really hope i aint a pain in the ass or anything! i very quiet lah i know, but i try to open up as soon as possible;D jesslyn team pro! :D

so tired. yawn. yawn. yawn. LOL. i wan to sleep so badly. :( HAHA. bb!

hahahaha! i am like damn bloody horny. HORNY. i am serious. nobelle was almost going to chop me up and fcuk me up if i didn't stop talking about organsms or anything to do with sex. i bet nobelle is heating up too lor, just that she was too embarrassed to say anything YET! don't worry nobelly boo, tomorrow i bet you will be highing with me! i found out new information about guys!! (thx to a friend who exchange body secrets!) omg. i am like getting so horny (x2 of sec 1) that i can't stand myself.

yay. today was chui simin's birthday! SIMIN HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!:d

we went to vivo and jas and i went to buy a cake and presents in like 20 minutes. WOAH. lol. we were like rushing from one point to another lah. :D then we went yoshinasa (dunno how to spell and i don't care le) lol. and we got all our presents out! jas and i got a cute balloon and a card full of love and ELEPHANTS. betcha liked it right!:D

hehe. then after that i went to meet jiarong and we went on SHOPPPIIIINNNNGGGG SPPPPRREEE! :D i mean for jiarong. i was like tagging along, and "uhhuh" "yeah." "okay lah" "not bad lah" "uh... okay" and no comments. surprisingly, despite my lengness, she was very high still. aiya although shopping goes for a new meaning now, but it doesn't change a thing lah - shopping sucks like hell. LOL. you are right, i am really not a girl.

walao leh my mother saw my book "french kiss" and she was like going crazy about why i am reading a romance novel. i was like excuse me, i thought i bought twilight le?walao leh. only a romance novel won't make me go crazy or anything. i mean the book isn't decent lah, but it's LOOKS decent at least.... :( why need to overreact lah! and plus my bro agree with her leh. WHERE IS FAIRNESS!!?? i am not like craving for sex or anything can. (horny only)

and she find my songs noisy. don't like go away lor.

anyway i am glad you are happy again okay. :D and i guess it's time for a happy GOODBYE!

oh crap. sorry for being so emo for the previous post. i was thinking of deleting it, but i forgot how to LOL.

thx to all those who tagged me (most since i started this blog) haha. i am okay now! i apologise to any one person who thinks i went crazy after NAPFA!

it's a lot of thanks to gaun actually. since i got this stupid injury and i coulnd't recover, i had this mind block from any physical exercise. my comfort zone kind of narrowed to only running and walking and sitting and stuff. clinic is still one major route i have to take before that mental block goes away, but for now, i will try to keep my leg in check and stuff bah. no more amputatuion okay! gaun kind of woke me up slightly, though she insist i would be 'charming' if i slimmed down LOL.

oh yeah, i forgot to post about ytd. we had meet the parents session, and i got the time slot wrong for my parents. it was supposed to be at 9 plus, but i saw wrongly as 8 then we came to an empty school. urgh. then i saw the time slot again and was like "crap. i am dead." true enough my parents were so pissed off, then they went for the principal talk first at 8.30 lor. and they realised need 3.0 to promote from year 4 to 5. gg. LOL. then they talk to mr chng and he told them i copy work. but they didn't scold me lor! surprise! and i was so worried can. LOL. okay. then they see mr. chua and mr. chua so cute as usual! lol. then they wan to see mr. hook since i failed my english lol. then my parents made some bad comments about him lor LOL! :D

thanks guan lin. thanks a billion:D

you know, i used to have a private blog that i scold the f word in like crazy. and ram my heart out. but now, i feel like ramming everything out fucking here.

i failed NAPFA. i failed it so badly. and no one cares. i always felt that being fat isn't the worst part about anything. i always felt that having a useless left leg didn't mean that everything was over. i thought i could live life as per usual. i thought i was still... normal. but everything proved me wrong. i couldn't do sit-and-reach. i couldn't do standing broad jump. i couldn't even do that fucking shuttle run. what is wrong with me? everyone encouraged me, but my heart really ached. and i felt like breaking down. it was not like it was the first time i failed in pe, i told myself. but it was the first time i failed three stations in one go. i felt so useless. fuck life.

i went to vivo with jiarong cherie weiting annies and this junior guy called weiyang. okay. it's quite weird lah. masked. then i kept a straight face and announced to the world that i failed my napfa. fine... i did. then i went home with cherie and talked as per usual. distractions aren't too bad. then i reached home. then my mom asked me how was my napfa. i almost cried. a little more and i will leave that fucking glistening tear behind. she even asked me why i failed this time but not last year. i totally shouted (maybe cherie heard it a few doors away) "you are like asking the most obvious question in the world."

i really want to amputate. LOL. timothy, don't be freaked out. i will tell you before i really did. :D

happpy news: maths, bio test all over. yay! i went to vivo and pranked called. i love my manly voice. :D

when i put on a fucking happy face, don't take me for granted. i feel worse inside. fuck life. and fuck you.

oh yeah. we had mass convo on ytd and i tot i was doomed.

i came home fairly early. then i slept very early. i slept from 6(after i bathed) till 8? then i had dinner then i went online. then i talked talked talked till 12 and i was tired so i went to sleep. :D

we had mass convo with our ex-teacher LOL. damn funny we kept blackmailing him with his ugly photos. then iw as like "hey, all the photos i took all damn blurry and fugly lor. maybe it's your face." hahaha. i kept suaning him like siao. it was damn funny.

thanks, i owe you one for bringing part of me back.

LOL. then we kept suaning him like siao. maybe it was only me. LOL. i love suaning all of a sudden.

today didn't have bio test lor. i during recess damn pro. i sat there alone in class with a few monkeys there. and i listen to my music on one ear, then i covered the other ear with my hand. then i started murmuring to myself the words on the bio thing. at the end of 30 - 40 minutes, i was almost done!:D but now i completely forgot liao le.

thanks angel so damn much. that CJ7 doll is really cute.

today cca was okay! first aid, so i was like lying there motionless all the time. i was a little tired actually...:( then i almost fell asleep.

i went home and talked to jiarong on the phone for one whole hour. after that i was like fuming. i almost pissed my parents off, and i ignored them when they nagged a little. i felt like glaring, but they were innocent. then i cooled down.

i miss 2L. i miss 2L. i miss my old life. i miss myself.

fuck you.

ahha! i finally changed my blogskin. i like this one. it looks like a gothic thing. or wadever. i just like it!:D i at first screwed up everything and i took about 15 minutes to get back back in the right place:D hehe!

hahaha! i read a friend's blog, and i decided to post about my favourite songs, because i think i don't like the type who will listen to my kind of music.

basically, i used to like sentimental chinese songs or english songs. but english songs didn't seem to give me the sentimental feel like chinese, so i was full-time chinese (out of bro's influence). then i listened to jap from watching anime for about a few months. then my dad scolded me for being a bimbo for listening to jap songs. (my parents have very stupid comments about things i can't list all out, if not the list will lead on to great wall of china) then lately about a year ago, i started listening to english songs, and i got addicted to the good rock beats and clever lyrics. chinese songs can't provide that okay. as for jap, lyrics are cool, but i can't understand. thx to jiarong, i have quite a collection okay! lol. jasmine still update me on chinese songs now and then, but i like english a lot more. chinese songs are still ok, but i won't keep listening in case i get sick to it. chinese songs are so boring compared to english songs sia.

My favourite list:
the click five - jenny/ time machine/ happy birthday
taylor swift - our song/ teardrops on my guitar
fall out boys - the take over, the break's over
Hinder - lips of an angel (bloody emo)
Fergie - clumsy/ big girls don't cry
Jonas brothers - Year 3000/ When you look me in the eyes
The last goodnight - pictures of you
Miley Cyrus - one in a million/ rock star/ East Northnumberland High
Nicole Scherzinger - Super villian (good change from superhero LOL)
Paramore - Misery business
Sara Bareilles - Love song (cute song)
Chris Brown - with you/ gimme that

heh that was a lot right. i know it! hahaha. i am going to post more, but i decided to stop ltr this post reall drive all of us crazy. haha. today was so lame. i went to pray from 10 to 12. then i went to my cousin's house from 12 to around 2 then i went home. my mother don't let me on com so i stoned and lazed around and got scolded for 2 hours before i used the com HAHA.

My angel, i hope you will be sweet okay! i don't care, i want to get a sweet angel okay. even if you ain't sweet, be sweet to me! (even if you are guy) hahaa. my mortal is gonna be so pissed on monday because i wrote a letter using my pri sch friend's handwriting. so obviously she won't find me out! sorry though no presents yet, i need to save up. i wanted to dedicate her a song but i can't find any song to describe a friendship! aiyo. die liao lor. gg. but nvr mind, i am sure she won't mind yet! :D

God. I realised i changed a lot from year one to now. i was at first more humourous and funny and in another way charismatic (or ego:D) and i am a major bully okay! but now i am like... always picked on, like making faces, funny in wrong ways... oh shit. i wish i could find my funny side back sia. if not i will be doomed to be lame. (lamb chop) I miss myself!

today was 2.4km run. woots. i actually passed by 0.01 minute okay!!:D:D:D so happy okay
jodee and i ran tgt,and both of us got like stitches like hell. thx jodee for encouraging and thank me too! hehe!
we had biology remedial after school today from 3 to like 6??!! lol. mr. chow we will miss you ok, though you are only our teacher for one week. :D we kept taking funny photos, and keng hwee showed mr. chua's mr. chng's photos. and it's so damn bloody freaking funny because he zoom in onto their faces!! there is one with mr. chua teaching, then his face was totally hilarious, because he was grinning and smiling, yet serious! i liked the second one when mr chua was trying to stop keng hwee from taking his photo but it was too late, so it was a photo of superman mr. chua raising his hand forward and his face contorted. SO FUNNY!! lol mr chng still pawn LOL.

ouch. my leg hurts like hell now. LOL.

i tried doing sit-and-reach just now, and lala. i can't do it. and now whenever i stand up, i experience pain in my left knee. wow, and tmr is 2.4km run. hahaha... am i supposed to rejoice?

i like my mortal! though i dunno her too well, but i want to know her better! she's very nice lor!

CID very nice, very funny. kept laughing and talking, though i didn't feel like it!
english was like so dumb. i was like playing with my stapler, and teacher said what "you won't do that to your husband right!" and lots of stupid things. walao so paiseh.
chinese is still about the same. guo lao shi is my idoL!
maths. urgh wadever!
we went subway at anchorpoint, and i was laughing half my head off at jiayi who laugh like some idiot because i open my mouth. like what the hell! lol!